Tag Archive | working mom

Working or Staying at Home Mom

So I have been a full time stay at home mom for 18 years.  When I married my husband I was finishing college, and working as a nanny.  To give a little background, my parents felt college was a necessity so I could have a “fall back” plan since I have always wanted to be a stay at home mom.  My husband and I had many conversations about being a stay at home mom but he never asked me what I wanted before kids.  He thought I really enjoyed being a nanny so we didn’t change things when our first daughter was born.  I had a nanny job that paid well and I was able to take our first daughter to work with me.  2 ½ years later when our second daughter was born I asked for an extra day off and the family fired me, (our daughter was 5 days old).  From that day on I have been a stay at home mama.    

By us living on one income we have to live on a budget and sometimes money is extremely tight.  Right now my husband is working on getting a second job to help pay off debt and buy a home.  He is insistent that I not get a job; as I already have a full time job being a mom, raising our kids and he doesn’t want that to change.  He also believes it is his responsibility to provide for the family.  

Let me be clear, I am not putting anyone down for their life choices.  Just remember these are your choices and you have to own them.  With every decision comes some sacrifice. By working outside the home, you sacrifice things like time with your kids, getting things done around the house, the ability to home school.  On the other hand, being a stay at home; you don’t have the extra income to go out to dinners, go on big vacations, have “me” time.  So we all need to weigh our choices, and decide what sacrifices we are willing to make.  We need to accept the decisions each person makes.  It is not our job to tell others what to do or expect people to pick up where we lack.  Nobody should be responsible to supplement income for the stay at home, just as nobody should be responsible to pick up the pieces for the working mom.  We are all moms and we all have our families to take care of, there is no need to try to one up or put another down.  Don’t be a “mom-bully”, show respect and love to one another.

Stay strong and be blessed!